Let us create a 3D eBook for you!
Let us create a 3d Digital eBook for you! DigyCat.com

Cultivate a Friendship with Death


Why We Fear Death

"Men fear death as children fear to go in the dark." - Bacon

There may be a thousand reasons why we fear death, but most of all we fear death because we fear the unknown, and death is an unknown entity to most people. We fear that dying may be painful and we do not know what will happen to us at the point of death.

Some people fear death because they imagine the dying process to be very painful. Death is not painful. In fact, death is often very peaceful and silent even for those suffering from cancers or other terminal illness.

When the physical body is deteriorating day by day from a terminal illness, and pain arises from superficial wound such as bed sores, or deep pain such as bone or nerve pain, death may even be a welcome relief for the sufferer.

We need to distinguish the pain of the physical body from the process of dying. The dying process is a distinct process that is separate from the deterioration of the physical body. At the point of death, there is no pain.

What happens at death is the cessation of the breath and all other physiological functions of the physical body. The heart stops pumping and the blood circulation stops moving. The body stops generating heat, and thus progressively turns cold.

For those who believe that we are more than just a physical body, and that we are in fact spiritual beings, the dying process means much more than just physical death. Death is just a natural process that allows us to discard the physical body as we move into the spiritual realm.

Since our fear of death is due to the fact that we do not know or understand death, it makes sense to familiarise ourselves with it. The more we understand death, the less we fear it. We should therefore cultivate a friendship with death, and be totally familiar with it, just as we are familiar with our friends.

We can cultivate a friendship with death in three simple steps:

1. Establish a link with God.
2. Cultivate a habit of acceptance, instead of blame.
3. Be a blessing to others.

Establish a link with God.

By establishing a link with God, we touch base with our own spirituality. God can be whatever you perceive God to be. For Christians, Muslims and Hindus, that may mean an omnipotent God. For Buddhists, it may mean the Buddha seed within. Atheists may have to come to term with their own spirituality.

Establishing a link with God means re-gaining your spirituality. It leads you closer to the spiritual aspect of yourself. Whether we accept it or not, we are more than just this physical body. When we die, we leave this physical body behind and only our spirituality continues on.

It is therefore essential for us to be familiar with our own spirituality. It is the only part of us that continues after death. This 'fact' is in accordance with all major religions.

Cultivate a Habit of Acceptance.

It is funny how when good things come to us, we readily accept them as though we deserve them or we have worked hard for them, yet when calamities befall us we quickly look for an external source to blame.

This is especially so when misfortunes such as terminal illness befall us. We may blame God, and later blame ourselves or people around us. We should cultivate a habit of neutrality regardless of whether good or bad things come our way. Otherwise, we can become very bitter about life when negative things happened. Looking for someone or something to blame only serve to prolong our own suffering. Death is an enemy when we resist it, but the moment we accept it, it turns into an ally.

However, cultivating a habit of acceptance does not mean not doing anything to correct or improve our conditions. It does not mean, for example, that when we are diagnosed with a terminal illness we do nothing about it. It is only sensible to seek treatment, if it is available to us. On the other hand, it also means we must know and accept when curative treatment is no longer possible. We fear death only when we refuse to face it.

Unfortunately, there are unscrupulous people who would take advantage of our fear of death to sell their 'cure'. In my experience with the terminally ill, I have come across countless stories of dying people being duped into parting with their savings and properties in the hope of achieving a cure.

Be a Blessing to Others.

This is our greatest and most reliable ally at the time of death.

Knowing that we have been helpful to others and that we have tried to live a blameless life takes away the fear of death. If our life has been an honest one, free of any conscious intention to hurt any living beings, we have nothing to fear when death approaches. Our mind will be at peace, undisturbed.

On the other hand, those who lead selfish lives, and harm others to get little advantages for themselves, find themselves imprisoned in tiny, dark cells when they move to the other side.

Therefore, while we still can, we should give our best to the world and to people around us. Lend a helping hand to others and help to lighten their loads. Bring joy to the joyless and comfort to those in need of comfort. There are many who are less fortunate than us. Count our blessings and be a blessing to others.

Tim Ong is a medical doctor with more than 14 years of experience in family medicine. He is the author of the online "Build From Within" ezine and "The Book of Transformation". He is also the webmaster of http://www.theselfimprovementsite.com


MORE RESOURCES:

Grief - Google News

This RSS feed URL is deprecated

This RSS feed URL is deprecated, please update. New URLs can be found in the footers at https://news.google.com/news

After school shooting, anger and grief dominate anti-gun rally - Miami Herald


Miami Herald

After school shooting, anger and grief dominate anti-gun rally
Miami Herald
They showed up bearing homemade signs and placards that honored the victims of the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School shooting. They chanted and cheered and spoke of surviving a massacre that claimed 17 of their friends, teachers and loved ones ...
'President Trump, do something!' Grief turns to anger as Florida victims' relatives plead for gun control measures Telegraph.co.uk
How Trump has responded to moments of national grief ABC News
Addressing 'a nation in grief,' Trump says he will visit Parkland Tampabay.com
CNN  - NBCNews.com
all 3,294 news articles »

Picture one LI grandfather's grief - Newsday


Newsday

Picture one LI grandfather's grief
Newsday
... Suffolk said it would follow Nassau's lead in adding opioids and other controlled substances to the county's social host law, which makes homeowners responsible for alcohol use by minors. And earlier this month, Long Island authorities were ...

Grief camp provides children with emotional outlets through arts and activities - Baltimore Sun


Baltimore Sun

Grief camp provides children with emotional outlets through arts and activities
Baltimore Sun
“It loosely follows [William] Worden's tasks of grieving, which are to accept the finality of the loss and incorporate it into your life and move forward and honor the emotions that you have,” said Anne Hansen, senior director of patient experience and ...

Grief as Filipina maid's body found in Kuwait freezer returns home - Khaleej Times


Khaleej Times

Grief as Filipina maid's body found in Kuwait freezer returns home
Khaleej Times
Grief as Filipina maid's body found in Kuwait freezer returns home. AFP/Iloilo (Philippines). Filed on February 17, 2018 | Last updated on February 17, 2018 at 10.37 pm. Share; More >. Vote. 0. Eva, mother of Joanna Demafelis (left), cries on receiving ...

and more »

Nigel Havers credits wife for saving him from grief - RTE - RTE.ie


RTE.ie

Nigel Havers credits wife for saving him from grief - RTE
RTE.ie
Veteran actor Nigel Havers - who will shortly star at the Gaiety Theatre - credits his wife Georgiana Bronfman for saving him from grief following the death of his second wife, Polly Williams.

and more »

There is no guidebook for grief, say editors of new compilation, 'Modern Loss' - The Times of Israel


The Times of Israel

There is no guidebook for grief, say editors of new compilation, 'Modern Loss'
The Times of Israel
More than a decade ago, Gabrielle Birkner and Rebecca Soffer became members of the same club — one neither of them ever wanted to be part of. As young women, they both suffered the sudden loss of both of their parents. Birkner's father and stepmother ...

The Starbucks in Parkland, Florida Has Become a Grief Center - Daily Beast


Daily Beast

The Starbucks in Parkland, Florida Has Become a Grief Center
Daily Beast
I know you're in a better place. Duques forever. Man I love you junior!!!! R.I.P Martin Duque!” https://www.instagram.com/p/BfNbqvJlUBj/?hl=en&taken-by=miguelduq19. It was signed with a black heart emoji. A GoFundMe account started by Miguel has raised ...

Grief and anger as Florida prepares to bury victims of school massacre - CNBC


CNBC

Grief and anger as Florida prepares to bury victims of school massacre
CNBC
As families prepared to bury victims of another U.S. mass shooting, grief mixed with anger amid indications that law enforcement may have missed clues about the suspected gunman's plans. Nikolas Cruz, 19, who had been expelled for disciplinary problems ...
'How Did This Happen?': Grief and Fury After Florida Shooting New York Times
Grief and anger as Florida town mourns young victims of deadly school shooting The Straits Times
Grief counselors offer support in the wake of Florida school shooting ABC News
Reuters  - NPR
all 8,813 news articles »

Grief counselling by the frozen peas. A story about snowflakes - Irish Times


Irish Times

Grief counselling by the frozen peas. A story about snowflakes
Irish Times
I know a wise woman who usually charges by the hour, but when things get really bad, she'll will give me 10 emergency minutes for free. I stand in the Centra, beside the frozen goods, and take counsel on a mobile phone. My friend Aisling died and I ...

and more »

LargeFriends.com - the best dating site for plus-sized singles!
SuccessfulMatchCentral.com - the best dating site for plus-sized singles!

PreLaunchX

DietRight.biz Domain Is For Sale - $8,500 For Enquiries eMail Us

© www.DietRight.biz 2012

home | site map | links